PRACTICAL LOVE IN MARRIAGE -PART 1

OPENING PRAYER
Father, let true and genuine love flow in all our marriages.

MEMORY VERSE: "My little children, let us not love in work, neither in tongue; but indeed and in truth." 1John 3:18.

BIBLE PASSAGE: 1Corinthians 7:2-5

1 Corinthians:7.2
Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband.
1 Corinthians:7.3
Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband.
1 Corinthians:7.4
The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband [does.] And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife [does.]
1 Corinthians:7.5
Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

INTRODUCTION:
Love is a fundamental characteristics of who God is. 1John 4:7-8. Everything God does is prompted and influenced by His love. The Bible uses several different words for "love" in the Hebrew and Greek, interchanging them depending on context. Some of these word's mean "affectionate love"; others indicate "friendship"; and still others, "erotic/sexual love" as we "sacrificial/charitable love".

TEXT REVIEW: 1Corinthians 7:2-5

Apostle Paul gave three (3) instructions to believers on marriage between verses 2-5. These instructions are stated below:

(i). Let every man or woman get his own wife and her own husband. 1Cor. 7:2.

(ii). Let the husband and wife render due benevolence to one another. 1Cor. 7:3

(iii). Let the husband and wife defraud not one another.

What are the reasons behind these instructions?

(i). You marry to avoid formication. 1Cor. 7:2

(ii). You render benevolence in marriage to strengthen the marriage. The word "benevolence" means : Disposition to do good. It also means lovely, kindness, gift, etc. When you sow love, you will reap love.

(iii). You should not defraud because, the moment of doing so, Satan will tempt you.

Other guides for lasting marriage from the Bible passage are:

(i). Give yourself to fasting and prayers. Verse 5b.

(ii). Surrender your power to one another. Verse 4. Power here means exclusive authority and control over his or her body. This authority should be surrender to one another in love.

LESSON OUTLINES
1. "Eros" Erotic/Sexual Love
2. "Philo" Friendship Love.

”EROS" EROTIC/SEXUAL LOVE.
(i). Teacher should find out from the students what they understand by the term "erotic love".

(ii). Teacher should explain the Greek word "eros" as the sexual love or feeling of arousal that are shared between people who are physically attracted to each other.

(iii). Teacher should find out from students whether erotic love has places or root in the Bible.

The expected answers are as follows:

(a). Yes. It has Biblical support if the couple are legally married. Matt. 19:5.

(b). Yes. Because the Bible admonishes married couple not to deny each other with erotic/sexual love. 1Cor. 7:2-5.

(c). Yes. Because sexual intimacy prevents temptation that could lead to sin. 1Cor. 7:5

(d). Sexual intimacy between couple could begin with fore play to produce sexual enjoyment. Songs of Solomon 1:13-15; Eccl.4:11; Prov. 5:19-20.

(iv). Under what condition can erotic love become sin?

Answer:
When it is perverted by the Satan and list and when it is expected outside marriage. Rom. 1:24-28; 1Cor. 6:9; Rev. 21:8; 1Thess. 4:3.

(v). What can Christians do to avoid perversion of erotic love?

Answer:
Couple could be guided by Christian counselors and godly literatures. Hosea 4:6.

CLASS ACTIVITY 1
Why should a believer not behave in the same way an unbeliever should behave in the expression of erotic/sexual love?

"PHILO" FRIENDSHIP LOVE.
(i). Teacher should explain the term "Phileo/Philia" as a brotherly/friendship love which is exhibited in a close, friendly relationship. Prov. 18:24.

(ii). Teacher should give examples of Phileo in the account of David and Jonathan. 1Sam. 18:1-3.

(iii). Teacher should give characteristics of Phileo love as follows:

(a). Feeling of warmth and affection towards another person.

(b). It cherishes each other and expect affection in return. Rom. 12:10.

(iv). Question:
What lessons do Phileo love transfer to married couple?

(a). Couples are to cherish one another with warm affection.

(b). Couple should exhibit sense of comradeship and friendship and must be willing to share and communicate their thoughts, plans, dreams and feelings. Eccl. 4:9-10.

(c). Lesson of confidence in each other's attitude and behaviours.

(d). Phileo love scores the marriage performance satisfactory coupled with the bedroom passion.

(v). Question:
What is the biblical position/God's desire for believers with regards to Phileo?

Answer:
God wants husband and wife to tenderly love each other in warm affection and overlook the faults and failures/weakness of each other. 1Peter 4:8.

CLASS ACTIVITY 2
How can warm friendship/affection be maintained in the marriage?

SUMMARY
Both Erotic and Phileo love are crucial in marriage.

CONCLUSION
The love that lasts longer than dinner and movie must be made up of Eros ( physical attraction) and Phileo (friendship). Do your best to be intimate with your partner marriage.

CLOSING PRAYER
Class to pray to God to give married  couple sincere grace to cherish each other with warm affection.

ASSIGNMENT
Find out ten (10) reasons why some couples quarrel or fight. 1mark for each point.

SUNDAY SCHOOL HYMN

1. O Sunday School, on the Lord's day,
O how I love Thee well,
I am happy, it makes me glad
To rejoice at Thy birth.

2. O Sunday School, on the Lord's day,
Thy friend friendship suits me well,
Both young and old will sing Thy song,
We long for Sunday School.

3. O Sunday School, on the Lord's day,
Christ was Thy first teacher,
The Holy Spirit, great teacher,
Does manifest in thee.

4. O Sunday School, on the Lord's day,
This testimony is sure,
That God, the Father Almighty,
Poured His blessing on Thee.

5. O Sunday School, on the Lord's day,
Though the sun be so bright,
Or if the clouds be black with rain,
I'll be in Sunday School.

6. O Sunday School, on the Lord's day,
I rejoice to see Thee,
Will thou pass over me today?
Without my being blest?

Reference : RCCG Sunday School Teacher's Manual, Lesson Eighteen, 2018/2019 Edition